Friday, February 18, 2011

YOUR NEW FAMILY

Are you married? Then you will be one of the many people who disagrees with this quotation:

"Adam was the luckiest man; he had no mother-in-law."
Mark Twain
It actually is not proven right all the time...but I hear of it a lot of times. I have no reason to take sides since I am not married yet. I have no in-laws to love or to hate. But I have seen a lot of in-law to in-laws relationship and good new is, I have heard POSITIVE comments more that negative.

It is a tradition in this country for children to get married and still stay with their families, either with the wife's or the husband's. It is normal to see such arrangement for different reasons. It can be that they had an early marriage and that they are incapable of living on their own yet (it being a 3rd world country, it is not surprising!), or that the couple are both working and they need the trusted guidance of their parents for their kids they will leave behind with a carer, or the warm compassionate love and tendering Filipino's have for the elders that we cannot just leave them in the care of others ( institutions). This arrangement then became the reason for two families to stay in one place, more often, the in-laws staying with the newly wed...thus became your new family.

New family...extended family to be specific, are a lot harder than raising your very own in the sense that you are all adults reared by different people with different attitudes, different views of things, different everything that suddenly have to live together and adjust to everything. It is only natural that not everything you want will be the same as their wants. The key then so as not to have the same thought as mark twain is to have GIVE AND TAKE between your in-law and you. It actually is not a written rule but the appropriate rule that both ends should do likewise for a successful and contented life together.

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